We may like to call ourselves a ‘conservative’ nation that promotes the philosophy of a family – we do our do – but a latest survey by Gleeden, an extramarital dating app, shows otherwise. We may hold marriage as a sacred institution, but the way people navigate relationships is quietly, yet steadily, shifting.
A growing number of Indians are turning to discreet digital platforms to seek companionship, validation, or simply something missing in their existing relationships. And this is not just hearsay. Numbers are beginning to reflect that change.
Gleeden has crossed 4 million subscribers in India, and that could mean a lot of things.
A quiet shift in how India loves
The rise of such apps is not in isolation, and it is also a sneak peek into what is happening in the background—changing attitudes towards marriage, fidelity, and personal fulfilment.
In 2024, Gleeden conducted a study involving 1,503 married Indians across Tier 1 and Tier 2 cities, aged between 25 and 50, to understand how people perceive marriage and infidelity today. The findings pointed to a growing willingness to question traditional relationship structures, even as societal expectations remain largely unchanged.
The research revealed that over 60 per cent of respondents were embracing non-traditional dating methods, such as swinging (a sexual activity in which both singles and partners in a committed relationship engage with others for recreational purposes), and the results indicate a growing openness to alternative relationship practices (open relating and relationship anarchy).
And it’s not just one platform indicating this shift.
Ashley Madison, another global app known for facilitating extramarital connections, revealed last year that Kanchipuram in Tamil Nadu, a town more commonly associated with temples and silk sarees, has emerged as one of the country’s hotspots for affairs, according to its June 2025 data.
Together, these data points suggest that what was once considered taboo is increasingly moving into the realm of quiet normalisation.
Snigdha Ghose (name changed) is a marketing analyst working in Mumbai. When asked about evolving relationships in India and infidelity, she says, “It is not uncommon to see this play out in the open. In most cases, people involved in such setups are well aware (like the wife knows about the affair but chooses to keep quiet), and now, the open marriage concept is well on the rise.”
Aniruddha (name changed), a Chief Product Officer, has been married for well over 12 years. He admits to having enrolled on extramarital dating apps. His wife may not be aware of it, but he says he uses it just “for the thrill of it and excitement.”
User behaviour on the app
Gleeden’s latest data offers a closer look at who these users are and how they behave:
- 65% of users are men, 35% women
- A majority are married or in long-term relationships
- Women’s participation has grown sharply, up by 148% in the last two years
On average, Indian users spend 1 to 1.5 hours a day chatting on the platform. The timing of these interactions is telling. Peak activity is recorded between 12 pm to 3 pm, and then again between 10 pm and midnight, windows that often coincide with breaks from routine or moments of solitude.
Preference patterns also reflect conventional expectations in a modern setting:
- Men tend to seek women aged 25–30
- Women prefer men aged 30–40, often financially stable professionals such as doctors, senior executives, and chartered accountants
Beyond metros: the spread of discreet dating
As already mentioned, while metro cities continue to dominate, the trend is not confined to urban hubs.
Bengaluru leads with 18% of users, followed by Hyderabad (17%), Delhi (11%), mumbai (9%), and Pune (7%).
But perhaps more significant is the rise in users from smaller cities, including Lucknow, Chandigarh, Surat, Coimbatore, Patna, and Guwahati.
Women and the question of agency
One of the most notable aspects of the data is the sharp rise in female users.
The app attributes this to increasing confidence and independence among women when it comes to making personal choices. The platform also allows women to use it for free, which it says contributes to creating a more balanced and “safer” ecosystem.
But the numbers raise a larger question:
Is this growth a marker of empowerment, or a reflection of unmet emotional needs within existing relationships?
Sybil Shiddell, Country Manager of Gleeden India, described it as evidence of a “quiet revolution” in how people approach modern relationships.
“Many people consider marriage to be one of the most sacred institutions in this country, but are using outlets like this to search for a means of emotional expression and self-affirmation,” she said.
While we may keep debating what’s right or wrong, the reality, as you read this, is in the numbers.
– Ends
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